


Paging Doctor Pussy

by WolfsHowl5678



Series: Wolf's DBD Crack Fics [3]
Category: Dead by Daylight (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Gen, It's just more crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-28 00:32:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16713070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfsHowl5678/pseuds/WolfsHowl5678
Summary: Taunting the Doctor is always fun.





	Paging Doctor Pussy

Nea hated the Doctor. Not nearly as much as Claudette did, but his stupid insanity inflicting electricity was awful. She slammed a pallet down on his head, sprinting away from him as he broke the pallet, snarling to herself. What gave him the right to drive her insane?! Fuck that.

 

She could see a generator up ahead, the fog disappearing around it to reveal Jake and Ace working together on it. Shit. She had nowhere to go, not in this dumb fucking Institute with its straight and narrow hallways.

 

“PAGING DOCTOR PUSSY!” she shouted, seeing both of them jerk upright. They vanished a second later, clearly knowing what she had meant to do when she had shouted. She dashed past the generator, feeling the Doctor hot on her heels a second later.

 

“My name is Dr. Carter, not Doctor Pussy,” he snarled behind her, and she had a split second to think through what he said before it dawned on her. Oh my god.  _ Oh my god _ .

 

The baton thing he wielded swung, and she felt it ruffling her clothes as she continued to run.

 

“Yeah, whatever you say, Doctor Pussy!” she called back to him, cackling when he seemed to seethe with fury.

 

“Aw, poor little Doctor Pussy, can’t even catch a survivor,” she taunted. She probably shouldn’t be taunting him, but hey, she couldn’t claim to be sane right now. She was definitely going to tell everyone else about this though.

 

~~

 

The Killers, as a whole, were very confused. 

 

Evan came back from a trial, stating how one survivor had said she was sad he wasn’t ‘Doctor Pussy’. Philip came back, claiming a similar experience.

 

So did Bubba. And Michael. And Sally. And Anna. And Amanda. And Freddy. 

 

And basically everyone had heard some variation of the line by now. With each new repetition, Herman seemed to get angrier and angrier. It didn’t take long for someone to figure out that he was the notorious ‘Doctor Pussy’, which lead to some… uncomfortable questions about how got the name.

 

Somewhere out there, the Entity was laughing.

 

~~

 

“Hey, guys, it’s Doctor Pussy!” Nea cheered, seeing the Doctor stalking across the map. She was completely certain that they were all going to die this trial, but man was it going to be  _ fun _ .

 

“The Infamous Doctor Pussy! I get to meet you at last, it’s such an honor!” Kate, one of the newer survivors, proclaimed loudly as the Doctor approached them. She hadn’t yet had a trial against the Doctor, and Nea loved that she took the opportunity and ran with it.

 

The Doctor looked so genuinely outraged she couldn’t help but laugh at him, even more so when Kate, completely ignoring all signs of danger, reached forward and enthusiastically shook his hand.

 

“It’s such an honor, I have heard much about your pussy ways,” Kate said enthusiastically. The Doctor didn’t seem to have any idea what to do, standing there and staring at Kate like she was the crazy one. The generator they had been working on gave a chug, and Kate let go of his hand.

 

“Well, it’s been fun, but we have to go now! Bye Doctor Pussy!” she said, the generator lighting up a second later. They scattered completely, everyone running in a different direction, leaving the Doctor standing next to the completed generator.

 

Nea heard him yell in outrage and couldn’t stop the smile from breaking out on her face. Yeah, they were all totally going to die.

 

It was so,  _ so _ worth it.


End file.
